Poland Krakow

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Somethings that hold me back

My mom read from the book, it says shouldn't look back or miss the old time, should look at the future & look farer, isnt we shouldn't listen to 90's song although 90's song is the songs that grow up with me. We shouldn't stuck at the old times, like always miss the old good times, miss the ex partner, but thats not wrong as long as we dont get over obsessed. As long as we dont miss those notorious thing that we have done in the past, if not we will continue doing it.

I can't deny that I always went back to my ex office lately ever since i knew that they will be shutting down at the end of March, maybe thats the place where my emotion left, I've been worked in that company for 3 years, it consider a long period for the 27 years old me, my mom did ask me before why u can work so long at the company, I also wonder why, is this a good company? answer is no, but the most important is i can blend in very well with all the colleagues, maybe is the love, the care that make me stayed for 3 years, they treat me good, give me food, give me joy.

That is why I posted the email which i wrote at the moment i resign.

It is 31st of March today which is the last day of my ex company, I've been working whole day long until 5 o'clock, i was a bit hesitated because i still at my customer shop, at the moment i was thinking accompany my customer to have some chill out drink after their operation hours cos my ex company is closing soon as well. But at last i decided to go to visit my ex company, on the way i co incident met some hawker stall which makes me able to buy some finger food to them, i was quite happy to buy that. I went there few times, only this time I able to meet the Director Mr Tan Kam Foo, when Mr Tan saw me he straight away hang his hand on my shoulder which mean we are still close. He always said i look like his elder son. he said his elder son very similar with me, always stumble when talking, always reply with an answer with not much word, just like people ask: how are u? he will answer: fine thank you, is not like, hey, Im very fine today, thank you for your concern. he said his son style is very straight true & honest, but did he meant I'm very honest as well??? HAHHAHA thats really make me wonder, cos i wish that people will think I'm a honest people as well.

When Tan Kam Foo is talking beside me, i was like, im not listening to him, i feel that it just like 1 of the voice in this place, just like the day i was working here, i was so used to his voice around but I may not listening to him, maybe i just want to feel the last moment at this same old place with the same old colleagues, thats what i want to feel, i knew everyone is feeling very difficult & like complicated heart, i was like donno what to say cos after today everyone will have their own path, i should ask about whats the planning for future, all the best, or some encourage words but i didnt, cos dont feel like making the situation into tears. All I can do is smile. I am very sad to hear the word: gathering, cos after this is gonna hard for all of us to gather again with the same peoples at the same place, that place dont belongs to us anymore.

Never thought this will come to an end.
feeling just like:
Sunway Pyramid dont have decoration anymore.
The G6 dance club dont play music anymore.
The Marlboro Light dont have cigarette inside anymore.
Michael Jackson dont dance anymore.

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